30 Days of Truth: Day 6

Day6
The first thing that comes to mind here is… bury my husband.  I know, morbid right?  I can’t help it though, when I think of the absolute worst thing that could happen that I’d never ever want to do, that’s it.

I have this really childish inability to deal with it as well.  A number of times he has tried to speak to me about what will happen when he dies with the insurance and stuff like that, he’s even tried to talk about what music we’d like at our funerals!  Every time he even attempts it I tear up and tell him we’ll talk about it another time.  There’s always a reason why that particular moment is not the right time.

There never will be a right time.

Is it selfish that I sort of deep down hope that a long long time from now I am the one to go first?  I mean I should probably wish that he does because then he’s not left behind in pain, but the thought of spending any time in my life without even being able to talk to him is too much to bear.

Christ, I’m almost tearing up just trying to write this.

Some other things I hope I never have to do…

  • Clean a septic tank
  • Wear or change adult diapers
  • Re-lose all the weight I’ve lost
  • Cook for someone who knows a lot about food
  • Pry another slimy chicken bone out of my dog’s mouth
  • Walk barefoot over hot coals, glass or anything else stupid people try to walk on with no shoes
  • Have another colonoscopy
  • Eat any sort of bug or larvae, even if it’s covered in chocolate
  • Watch the movie Dancer in the Dark again
  • Touch another person’s armpits
  • Lose/remove any of my visible teeth
  • Live a life without dogs
  • Eat raw herring, or any herring for that matter.
  • Live on the streets or out of my car
  • Resign myself to the fact that I’ll never own a horse again
  • Die without knowing what I am supposed to look like, at a normal weight
  • Experience a war firsthand
  • Live without internet for an extended period of time
  • Work on a crab fishing boat
  • Slaughter an animal
  • Live with the cast of Jersey Shore

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11 comments

  1. I was quite mean to my mom when she said she would die before my father, or that she would die within 3 months if my father had gone first. Time heals.

  2. love how u go from husband dying to septic tank…took me just a second to catch up with you there. haha

  3. Work on a crab fishing boat? So random; so true! :)

  4. Are you immune to baby armpits? Or still not had the chance to lift up a child? You do grab them under their armpits? lol. I know, I’m silly.

    Ey, I don’t like fish but I did eat raw herring, I liked it better than most cooked fish!

    • No baby armpits don’t bother me, I guess they’ve not had time to fester yet haha Everything on a baby is sweet and soft and lovely :)

  5. What a list!!! ahahahhah

    So what is it about armpits that you don’t like?

    • I dunno I just hate them. I hate deodorant commercials, sweaty pits on t-shirts, armpit hair… all of it. If someone has a tank top on and puts their arms up, I can’t look. Hate.

  6. Yeah, living with the cast of Jersey Shore would make me want my husband to bury me first. LOL

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