The Story of Us

I’ve seen yet another meme that caught my eye, this time on Crafty Intentions and Dooce.com.  I like it because it’s about us and our husbands, and I love writing about my husband!

Here goes:

What are your middle names?
My middle name is BREIGH, most people reading here know that by now.   Strangely, my husband doesn’t have one.   I’m not sure why, I guess we’d have to ask his parents.   Maybe it’s a European thing!  Hrmm, I’ll have to look into that!

How long have you been together?
We have been together for almost 10 years (will be 10 years in June) and will be married for 9 years in May!

How long did you know each other before you started dating?
We never really dated.   We first met 15 years ago online when we were both in college.  After a few years of chatting as friends we met up and hit it off big time.  Knowing neither of us were the type to be able to deal with a long distance relationship, one of us had to take the plunge.  It turned out to be me and I moved to NL.   So we sort of went from online friends, to RL romance that in a short period turned into moving in and getting married.   Lots  of people thought we were nuts, we did too sometimes… I guess 10 years later we get the last laugh :)

Who asked whom out?
If “Hey I’m gonna fly over to Canada” counts as asking me out, it would be him!  Otherwise it all just sort of happened.

How old are each of you?
I’m 33 and he’s 34

Whose siblings do you see the most?
I’d say it’s probably a tie.  I have a half sister that I see when I go back to Canada and he has one brother who lives in the south of France.   We really only get to see either of them every few years.   Although his brother did live in Holland for the first few years I was here and we saw him lots then.

Which situation is the hardest on you as a couple?
Jeez, this one goes without saying, doesn’t it?   Living in a country where we have few friends and no family.  We are pretty much 100% on our own and not having a support system close by has been difficult.   Sometimes it feels as though all we have here is his job and when we look at it that way we sort of wonder why we are here at all.   Thankfully we’ve made a few good friends though so that makes life easier, plus he loves his work.   I’ll probably always feel out of place here but it’s been so long now I’ve stopped caring.  Maybe we’ll get out of here someday but for the moment this is it and we are working hard at making the best of it.

Did you go to the same school?
No I went to a small town public school in Canada, he went to a pish posh private German school in Ireland.  Completely different worlds.

Are you from the same home town?
No. I grew up in Cape Breton, on the east coast of Canada.  He was born in Holland and moved to Dublin with his family when he was young, where he stayed until he came back to Holland to go to college.

Who is smarter?
My first instinct is to say Xander.  Xander by a MILE.  He’s incredibly intelligent and he’s had a much better education than I have.  He has also had the benefit of growing up in Europe and travelling a lot.  He’s experienced many different languages and cultures as a child whereas I grew up and spent the majority of my life in a place where everything and everyone are the same.   I think I am more ‘street smart’ than he is and am a lot more intuitive when it comes to people as he tends to be very logical.   I’m sort of the Booth to his Bones (of course only the TV nuts will get that one).

Who is the most sensitive?
This one is me by a mile.   As I said, he’s quite logical.   When something goes wrong or something upsetting happens.  He sits down and tries to figure out how to fix it.  I, on the other hand, get completely wrapped up in the fact that it’s happening at all and have a complete meltdown.   We are polar opposites when it comes to emotion / sensitivity.   He often wishes I was less emotional, and I often wish he was more open with his emotions.   It’s something we are both working on.

Where do you eat out most as a couple?
We eat out a few times a month and it varies.  We often order Spare Ribs from a place called Spare Ribs King.  If we want to go out we’ll go to the Pannenkoekenhuis Oude Maas for some traditional Dutch pancakes (OMG-YUM) or to the Dream Cafe in town for some good ol’ back home style food like steak and burgers!

Where is the furthest you two have traveled together as a couple?
Canada

Who has the craziest exes?
hahaha oh god, ME!  It’s not fair though because I have waaaay more ex’s than he does so the numbers alone are against me!

Who has the worst temper?
Me again.  I guess it’s part of being the more emotional one.   Thing set me off easily whereas you can poke and prod Xander for hours and he’ll just look at you and blink.  I often wish I was more like him, but he’s had his own issues from holding things in too much so maybe not.

Who does the cooking?
Me… and it’s quite shocking because I don’t really ENJOY cooking. I do it because I’m the housewife and it’s part of what I’m supposed to do.  I didn’t come here armed with an arsenal of recipes but I’ve gotten a lot better over the years.

Who is the neat-freak?
I think I am.  Neither of us are neat freaks to the extent of driving the other crazy, in fact we’re both quite messy… but I am more of a neat freak in terms of things needing to have a place where they BELONG.  I hate just shoving things in drawers willy nilly and Xander is all about that.  So many times I’ve organized is tool chest or office just to have it ransacked the next day.  Makes.Me.Crazy.

Who is more stubborn?
HIM!!  Ohmygodheissostubborn!  I don’t know where he gets it but god help me, if that man doesn’t want to do something, go somewhere, watch something or get something – it ain’t happenin’!!  I can’t count how many times I’ve thought something would be a good idea just to spend days / weeks / months / YES EVEN YEARS trying to talk him into it.

The worst part is 80% of the time, when he finally gives in he says something like “Oh this was such a great idea, why didn’t we do this sooner”.

OH I DON’T KNOW, WHY DIDN’T WE?!

Who hogs the bed?
He does, all the damn time.   He sleeps in the shape of a V with his head and his feet making the top points and his ass at the bottom.   I dunno how many times I get butt bumped (and not even in the good way!) in bed at night.  He flops around like a fish, hogs the blankets, twitches like a mental patient and pushes me around with his arse.   I’m convinced we’ll be in twin beds by the time we’re 40.

Who wakes up earlier?
We are both early birds and are always up within an hour of each other.  I think it’s pretty even who gets up first.   That’s right now though, when Xander is working out of the office he’s always up earlier.  He gets up at ungawdly o’clock to get out and beat the traffic.

Where was your first date?
We didn’t really date.

Who is more jealous?
If Xander is the jealous type he rarely shows it, which I wish he would.  Sometimes a girl needs to feel like her man is at least a little jealous, it makes us feel good.  I, on the other hand, can be really jealous.   Like, seething jealous…  thankfully I never really have reason to feel that way with Xander though.  He makes it perfectly clear that he is a one woman man!

How long did it take to get serious?
Not long.  Our situation didn’t really allow for that whole ‘feeling it out stage’.  I think we probably would have gotten serious very quickly even if we lived locally though.  It’s true that when you know you KNOW, and I’ve always known that Xander was the one.  I don’t think I ever could have turned my life upside down like I did if I didn’t truly believe it.

Who eats more?
Me *sigh*  I’m a comfort eater.  I’m working on it.

Who does the laundry?
Me.  God love him he tries but after a few shrunken pairs of pants and tangled bras have come out of the dryer, I’ve banned him from anything except folding towels.

Who’s better with the computer?
Xander, it’s his job… I don’t have a chance with this one.

Who drives when you are together?
Xander does.  I don’t have my license.  Unfortunately it’s not possible to exchange a Canadian drivers license for a Dutch one, and I’d have to take lessons and exams which are very expensive.   I will get it eventually but for now we have other more important things to put our money towards.

If you want to answer these same questions, feel free to do so in the comments or leave me a link to the blog post with your answers. :)

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8 comments

  1. Canucky Woman:
    Nonononono.
    You can tell us Micks by our 7 GAZILLION middle names.
    Basically, you start out with one middle name. As an example, you have me, Sophie-Marie Annette. Then, you get a christening name OKay, so you have Sophie-Marie Annette Christine . Then you get conformation name, when you are about 14 or so. So you end up with Sophie-Marie Annette Christine Helene (__insert last name here)
    Which was definitely part of the reason for my early love affair with Darwin. :)

  2. My mom and dad, both born here in Europe don’t have middle names either. I don’t know about the religious thing since my mom was brought up catholic and my dad orthodox. My aunt doesn’t have a middle name either and she was born in Canada.
    My brother and I both born in Canada have middle names.

    Maybe it’s a play as you go thing with names. lol

    I should do one for my blog.

    Melissas last blog post… Week one

  3. Hmm, the name thing caught my eye, too. I found that funny since my Dutch friends all have three names… The 2nd and 3rd names would be their godparents’ names, so it’s a religious thing. They are from the south of the Netherlands, though. That’s a bit interesting, I guess? :P

  4. This is so cute. Hopefully, someday soon I will be able to fill out my own.

  5. Yeah, I asked my Dutchie, and apparently middle names just went out of fashion for anybody under the age of 40.

    So you can tell an old fart by his full name I guess!

  6. Wooooooooooo…interesting. Can I steal this?

    My hubby and his brother don’t have middle name, but their father does.

  7. I think it’s a Catholic thing, isn’t it? The middle name being the name they give you when you’re christened? I don’t know, not being religious, but my Dutchie has one, as does everyone in his family.

  8. Yeah, the lack of middle name seems to be a European thing. My parents are from Ausrria and Germany and neither my sister nor I have a middle name. Made sure my kids did, for getting their degrees. That’s where I really noticed it, I was the only graduate without one.

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